Thank god for the winds of wisdom for blowing us into ecstatic states of inspiration, empowerment and healing our separation. Without her gusts clearing our minds out and fanning the flames of our hearts we would be zombies. Without her loving caress we may never find the courage it takes to feel anything at all.
Today, I am interested in exploring our disempowerment. Not just how to fix it or to get back to what can seem to be a more "ideal" or perhaps even comfortable state of being empowered, but how to be with it. How to admit when we are uncomfortable and relax the muscles around our necks that want nothing more than to control our experience away from pain and back to pleasure.
As mystics, or people who care about up-liftment and evolution and doing our best to heal our wounds and make change for the better in this world, we have to look at suffering. Especially our own. Unless we are going to full on join a religion or cult, there is always a subtle vibration of uncertainty, of unknown that we are forced to live with. The great Mystery can be oh so beautiful and full of the light that we are made of, and yet the experience of embodying that light can be terrifying, full of darkness, abuse, disappointing ourselves and one another and having to live though some hard mis-steps.
This is life right? No one knows why we are here but some of us have a feeling it has to do with Love. With serving humanity and getting to consciously experience the Divine stuff we're made of. All other beings just are That. They don't have a choice to walk towards or away from their true nature. The gift of disempowerment is the sensitivity that comes from being with what hurts.
Naturally we move away form pain, and in yoga we learn how to disengage in our emeshment with it. But to feel it at all is actually a superpower in a way. It's our right as humans to serve and love and do our best, and it is also our job to anchor really intense energies into this world that has forgotten what is important. What is True and what is Real. Just like we do sometimes.
So today I want to honor the parts of you that are disempowered and feeling less than. The one in you that doesn't think it deserves. This is prime land to plant the seeds of a life devoted to what really matters.
To not just try to fix everything all the time, but to be with your experiences and not miss them. To sit there and maybe feel the pain and wishing things were a different way, and being held anyway. The truth is in our most challenging moments, when we feel the most abandoned, in hindsight we see how truly and effortlessly held we were. Despite how we acted or what we did right or wrong. Spirit isn't like the God we were taught that condemns and approves. BY nature as humans when we make mistakes, if we're away we feel the suffering of them. That is how we learn.
But the spiritual idea that we will create something negative out of feeling what we need to feel is bs. When we take the tiniest effort to pray, or crumble and at some point get back up to do something for someone else or practice receiving ourselves we're planting seeds. And these seeds will grow new life that we could never imagine. These seeds of devotion will guide us to the places we've never been but have somewhere inside known we must go.
To be disempowered is a great way to come even closer to surrendering, and perhaps surrendering completely and consciously to God's will for us. To not having to be the one who's "got it", and in fact to be the holy lovers that want nothing more than a hand to hold along the way imo is the best place to be. To find a friend in our Creator instead of just an enemy, and the remember the moments when we needed that gust of Grace the most, it was never and will never be too long before we feel her loving embrace.
This new moon I'm planting seeds of "you tell me" and "I surrender to your will". Because part of a relationship with anything has to do with listening. These seeds say, "I'm here show me how to serve and show up."
Join me for a six week class on connecting to your intuition, being HELD, and nurturing your connection to your worth through meditation and mantra, giving you some practical ways and support in listening and following the call of you heart and soul. We'll meet every week online and you'll get video recording with a discussion on topics such as worth, the goddess Lakshmi, addiction, voice, healing, kundalini and practices of meditation, mantra and breathwork. Email me or click here to join!