The Incredible Power of Touch
If you are God, and God is on your side . . . then who could be against you?
Women's shame and rage has seemed to me to be up and out there, from our own efforts of evolving to the shitty ways it's been in the media these most recent days. This is a post about the many ways we can heal through touch and being touched. Oh Lord the awesome, incredible power of touch just happens to be right here, in between my breasts, in this place called the heart.
Do you know how it feels when you haven't been touched in awhile? Omg it can be intense right?! Your body and insides start to ache or feel lonely and frustrated. It can also at times be a beautiful feeling of longing if you tap into it inside of out.
Being and feeling touched is a such a key ingredient in our practice to be present with ourselves and one another. For some of us multiple elements go into it in a way that brings about more presence, comfort, ease, openness and so much love that our skin softens and opens.
We ain't talkin' about just any ol' touch here folks . . . And for those that have experienced any trauma this is especially the case.
Since I was a kid I have always had a super charged sensual and sexual body. Seems kind of weird but you know how kids are with that stuff. Natural, honest and curious there is little holding back. Some kids seem to have it more than others.
There may have been some sexual trauma, or it was just passed down to me from my mothers lineage who experienced a lot of abuse. Either way that fire that makes me the wild and free woman I am today had, and has, it's shadow.
In part because of society and what we all have been conditioned to feel is ok or not ok, but much of it has caused me harm, shame, blame and pain in the end and I have come to learn on my own the shadow of that beautiful energy in me is quite the opposite to helpful. Reacting from the shadow of this power that in all of it's light is glorious juicy, creative love.
I was always someone who was touched and liked to touch others a lot. When it came to romantic relations it was often unhealthy, not having boundaries around how and when and why I wanted to be touched or didn't. It was and still can be confusing, do I wan tot have sex but I don't but he's not man so... it goes on and I hear it all the time from my women.
It's why I actively chose to stop having sex for awhile, mostly to see what would happen. What happened was that there was a lot of shame and heartache and grief to heal and be felt and still to heal and feel. And then there was the tremendous creative energy and natural power that I tapped into as well. ANd when it comes to all the other stuff, I don't have all the answers but I know it's time for us to listen to our bodies and give up the shame and blame game we put on ourselves. ok?!
Healing the shame we all hold is a doorway to deeper intimacy, trust within our bodies and connection to that truth we are all starving for. That little one inside we ignore can be fed and matched. We can now settle into being touched with tremendous love and enjoy it. Whether alone, with our healers or with our lovers and partners.
I am still working on relating to this part of myself and Grace, or at least have to be awake to it's presence and not react from the shadow of it but love this part of me. Not try to get rid of it but use it. It's a way that I get to feel that touch within on a subtle level. Now, I am committed to listening to her (the fire and the sacred/sensual energy), consciously letting her nourish me throughout the day, so I can then nurture those around me.
You know how you get all energized and excited when you're newly in love? It's like that, except the love energy is driven towards your life and your own wild heart and connection. We can of course do this when we are in love too and in relationships too - one of the most beautiful aspects of partnership that sometimes requires work well worth it.
On our own we can generate that same excitement for life as we hold space for the right lover and partners, focus on our businesses or families. To know what this feels like within ourselves is a big deal. I personally learned through training with a teacher very connected and initiated into a lineage where this energy is what people connect to, to heal and get free. Now I am learning to feel this completely on my own and within the many bodies of nature.
Not easy . . . there have been times facing into all this shame in me where I felt unseen and totally helpless, like after a breakup in a relationship you gave all of your power away. All totally worth it to know how special and important it is for me now to know that everything I have learned and seen on my journey so far is truly inside and right here. Right now. Not that that is my experience all the time, but a deep knowing that I am working into my body. Rewriting with super loving, powerful touch.
We know touch is crucial for emotional bonding in newborns, and as adults we crave that same bond - both within and with others. Touching, stroking and holding ourselves. Dancing especially when you don't feel like it is huge and is great medicine for healing the psychological hardness and bs that arises when facing into shame.
After hearing this suggestion by another woman in a circle a couple months back, I began to make part of my practice gently stroking my face and my body. And I don't mean just sexually but sensually. When I teach the sacred sensuality workshops we practice using creative movement and sound. From the very gross physical and voice to the super subtle energy of our wild hearts and sacred pelvic fires in meditation. It is all an invitation to receive, connect, surrender, heal and make space to create.
I will often start my online healing sessions by having women feel their hands on their face, head, arms. To brush away neck and back tension using our hands can release stress. Touching all parts of your body with your hands can bring more presence and love there.
Different than completely ignoring, or only giving the self-hating eye to it in the mirror. I completely know what that's like.
Our hands are insanely connected to our hearts. With practice this connection gets stronger. It is an energy that moves not from us but through. When we learn this on a subtle energetic level then the physical brings it all together in a bigger way whether we are moving, dancing, healing, receiving, orgasming or simply breathing consciously. It all takes on a new wave of deep potent Love.
It is your creative and birth right to feel yourself in this way. To love yourself and heal yourself in this way. Maybe you commit to dance naked in front of the mirror until your awareness shifts and expands so vast you can see that you are more than all of that flesh and bone. You will start to see your love. Your heart. The way that Grace moves your body, whether it's looks good or awkward or spaztic or sexy, Grace loves it all, and so can you. Your power and your beauty truly comes from deep within you.
If you are God, and God is on your side . . . then who could be against you?
To learn how to move past any shame and guilt and experience the soft gentle yet massive power that you hold in your touch, in your body is no small deal. I have a ton of support in my life so I can support others. That's the way it works. And if you have things come up or any shame or trauma in your body then you should too. I want you to know that you are not alone.
In the safe, healing touch of another we can let go of so much that hold us back from being with ourselves in a deep intimate and loving way. It can help us manifest our wishes and desires in our high moments and help us heal what's coming up in the lows. Touch, both physical and energetic is part of living a healthy, balanced, conscious loving life.
Reach out if you need support and if you want to learn more about Sacred Sensuality join us at Maha Rose on February 13th, a Full Moon Women's Circle Feb 22nd at Devi Yoga and an intimate Joy Circle Session with Samantha Elkrief that is a sound and healing touch, kirtan, discussion and food event . . . more information for February events here!
Sending a Big Hug and Love Touch to you